Life update.

Things don’t seem to be going right lately. I’m not complaining, I just find it helps to write how I’m feeling. So that’s what I’m doing.

I know I need to do many things in my life, make many changes. I don’t like the lax, yet stressful person I have become. I don’t want to really do anything, and then when I do I’m worried about how people will judge me for it.

Today was a pretty big day at work, a lot of announcements. A new boss is starting and he’s just been given the introduction to all the current staff. As well as that another of my ‘bosses’ just announced she is going to have a baby and is going on maternity leave soon. Everyone’s always having a baby in that place; it must be something in the water. I’m glad I bring my water bottled from home. I don’t need babies at the moment, thank you. Needless to say, things are going to start moving pretty fast in that place.

Yeah, so lots of things to change. I plan on getting rid of my job VERY soon. I’m just not happy in that place anymore. I’ve wanted to leave that place for a while, but I was always afraid of taking the step forward. It may seem like an easy step for some, but it’s something I had never had to do before. After talking to a few people (you all know who you are) I managed to get up the courage to tell my boss that I’m looking for another job. Man, it was such a good feeling, such a load off. I can’t thank those people enough for all there help and continued support in me. In the end, it wasn’t as difficult as I had led myself to believe. I’m on my way out of that place, I can feel it, and it feels great. Even though the job market is so unstable at the moment I am still considering giving it all in, while I look for another job. I’ve had my boss and my parents on me that ‘you need to have an income’, but everyday I almost loathe going into that place. I don’t even know why anymore. The job isn’t that bad. The people are nice and friendly. But I still just don’t wanna be there. I think I may have almost checked out mentally, now I’m just going through the motions.

Other things I need to do move out of home. Everyone says ’stay at home as long as you can, you’ll regret it if you don’t’ this may be true and I understand were they are coming from. Why pay for any expenses if you can get it for free or cheap? But I have a feeling, a feeling I can’t quite explain. Although my parents are very protective of me they still give me my own space for the most part. I thank them for that. But I yearn for more freedom, freedom which I can’t get while I’m living under this roof. It’s nothing in particular, just generally. I wanna start to be my own person.

Speaking to my boss today, maybe I need a nice long holiday. To get my priorities in order. I dunno. At the moment I just want everything to happen. I know it’s not, it’ll all take time. I know that.

Maybe instead of leaving my work so soon, I should keep looking for a job and use that income to move out. Maybe. But where do I move to, if I don’t know where I am going to work. It’s hard to see which piece of the puzzle to start off with first. I’m hoping once I can change a major part of my life i.e. my job or living arrangements, that when it comes to changing smaller things it wont seem so hard. I’m not saying that I’ll quit my job and it’ll all be smooth sailing from then on. Nah, but I need to jump right in otherwise I’ll be forever testing the water.

Geeze what’s with me and water today. I guess I am a little thirsty.
Hey, you know what the first thing I should do is? Stop bitching on my blog. I think that’s a good start.

Completely off topic here, what’s with this.

Twitter Whale

Alright Twitter, are you’re over capacity or have you now lost the ability to transport stoned whales around? I’d Twitter about this, but I guess I can’t.

Okay, well I guess that’s me for now. I’ll try and make the next update less whiny.

Thanks for sticking around.

‘night all.

Don’t cry, Sarah!

Also I sort of wanted to always try one of these, they look pretty fun. Also work is boring Here’s Sarah’s. Here’s mine:

1. The age I’ll be on my next birthday.

Stupid 24! Suck on a cock, Kiefer!

2. Your favorite colour.

3. Your middle name.

Wow! That’s really cool looking.

4. The place you lost your virginity (or would like to lose your virginity if you haven’t…)

What can I say I’m a traditionalist.

5. A bad habit of yours

Um…okay. I was going to go for rocking. Then I realized that’s not a bad thing! So I went for being bored…note: not being shitty as the comic may seem. Although maybe some people may agree with that.

6. Your favorite fruit or vegetable:

7. Your favorite animal

Nawwwwwwww. Such a cutie.

8. The town you live in

To be different I chose to do my suburb name instead of the city I live near, cause it’ll be the same picture as Sarah you see. Depressing that this first picture comes up and is about a guy getting charged for murder. My suburb’s not that bad! At least the part I live in anyway.

9. The name of a pet

I’ll take that as the name of the pet I used to have.

That seems stupid…:S

10. Your best friend’s nickname

Um…I don’t care about your ball dress lady! but I guess that’s what you get on the Internet. Sorry Jessie! I do sort of wanna find out who that is a sketch of behind her. Any guesses, guys?

11. Your last name

Ruins! Awesome! I always knew I was cool. Pick up two cards, bitches!

Well that WAS fun.

Bordom and Thoughts.

Bored.

I’m really not good at being bored. When I’m really bored, I can think of things to do but I just don’t wanna do any of it. I dunno why I suck at it so much. Why I can’t be left on my own, everyone else I know can. Is it possible that I fear my thoughts? Do I just like the company? Or is it something else?

I’ve been watching a lot of Dexter. It’s making me reflect a bit. About love, about feelings, about family, friends, loyalty. I know they make the show so that you can relate to certain characters and stuff. Still… Maybe I’m just susceptible to it all at the moment?

Sometimes I feel my head is all cloudy, everything I think comes out wrong. I swear I have the best intentions at heart, but it still comes off like I’m a jerk or something. My apologises to all those left in that wake. Maybe I just need to find my Lila, a person who gets me, who understands me. Here’s hoping she’s not a psychotic bitch though. I’m pretty sure that would makes things worse instead of better.

If only problems could be solved as easily as on a TV show. How much better would that makes things? Woops I made a mistake, well then i’ll just do this to counter it. It would all be so simple. I guess though other things would suffer, like everyone seems to easily change there core beliefs in TV shows without much thought. I couldn’t do that.
I just wish some things were easier but si la vi that’s life I suppose.

If it was just a matter of willing something to happen strongly where would we be? Maybe we’d have flying cars, but I’m sure there’s a downside in there somewhere.

Anyway, back in reality. The place with only a few flying cars. Things are harder. Or at least they seem to be. They say ‘Time heals all wounds’ but does it? Maybe in some cases time is the one doing the wounding. Then what do you do? I’m obviously not speaking of anything in particular here, I’ve just apparently gone all philosophical on my own arse. I’m just sort of typing. That’s called something, right? Were you just type whatever is in your head? I think that’s a thing. Therapists use it, I’m sure.

I’m one of those people that thinks that ‘communication is key’ in everything. Those who know me know that one of my pet peeves is lying. I can’t stand it. But I’m learning now that it’s all not black and white. It’s not just truth and lies. Sure there are plain liars and I just want to kill them and throw their corpse down a well, then set the well on fire. But you can speak the truth, but not tell the truth. Things get left out for whatever reason. Maybe you want to protect a person, maybe something rages you so much that you need to keep things superficial. It works for the most part, for the short term at least. But how can you base a relationship with anyone on trust if not everything is fully disclosed? That part I’m still learning. How do you know where you stand when you don’t have all the facts? I’ll let you know, when I do.

OK, so what am I doing? What am I doing with my life? Sometimes it seems nothing. Just floating. What am I waiting for? and the more important question, will it ever come?
It’s like a puzzle only I’m missing a piece. The main piece right in the middle, the one that makes the whole thing make sense. Will I find it? I don’t know, but I need to look. For the chance to be complete. Maybe that means a change in job, maybe that means taking a long holiday, maybe it means moving out, maybe it means taking a step outside my comfort zone or maybe it’s something else entirely.

Heh, Maybe this is why I don’t like being alone, who wants to assess their life when it all seems so wrong. What do you do it that situation? You can’t just start again. There’s no extra lives, no save points, no continues. But I wish there was, there’s definitely some things I would change. Oh, maybe a time machine would also work. Though I guess that depends on the Butterfly Effect, you know because that could really stuff things up, make things worse. I don’t want to live in a world were we’re enslaved by alien cheeseburgers or something weird like that. Though I’m fresh outta time machines at the moment, so I guess that doesn’t matter.

So it’s just me. Me, Myself and I. What a trio. With probably more stupidity then the three amigos, but do I have the bravery, the courage of the three muskerteers? Only time will tell.

Perth Supernova 2008

Okay, blogging,I do it…. occasionally.
Alright I had a few ideas about blogging recently all of which I have forgotten, why? One word…Supernova, followed by two more words…Jewel Staite.
Yep that’s right suck it everyone who never met her because she is sooo awesome. Okay I’m getting ahead of myself, I should start from the beginning.

We bought tickets about a month before the expo so everything was relatively planned. Friday night John and I went to see the preview night not much going on there but we did manage to catch the new Stargate movie, Continuum. It was alright…

Bam! Saturday. I arrived there just after the gates opened at 10am. The line was HUGE lucky having been the night before I had the wristband already so I walked past everyone and went straight on in. Had a bit of a look around, sussed everything out. Then headed straight to the autographing area. There was about 3 people in line waiting for autographs but no one was out yet. So I went through the store and bought a photo of Jewel to be signed and lined up. That’s when it started I could barely breathe the anticipation was just too great. My heart beat raced, I could feel it bulging out of my chest. ‘Calm down, calm down’ I had to repeat to myself ‘nothing’s even happening yet’. luckly there was a few guys in line which I ended up talking too, it helped a little.

I could feel my grip getting tighter on the photo as I held it, that’s when out of nowhere she entered; walking behind some tables and to her desk ready to sign. She had Kandyse McClure from Battlestar Galactica along with a few Supanova volunteers in tow.

*sigh* Jewel.

If anything she looked even more stunning in person. My palms went sweaty, I had to keep reminding myself that I needed to breathe to stay alive. alright….deep breaths… It wasnt much longer before the poeple in front of me had been through. ok, another deep breath to gather my composure. I walked over as casually as I could, I went over to her whilst trying to be as calm as possible. I handed her the photo the sign. the conversation went something like this:

“Hi”
“Hi”
“How are you?”
“Good, thanks”
*Pause* – This pause seemed to last ages, meanwhile the yelling in brain is saying ‘think of something god-darm it! THINK!’
“Thanks for coming and saving Perth Supernova”
“No worries”
*Hands the photo back*
“There you go, sweetheart”

It’s about that exact moment that I turned to jelly, I melted, I think I managed to say “thanks” actually I think I said it multiple times like my brain was stuck skipping like an old record player as it tried to assess what just happened.

Alright no worries, back in control now. I walked around the expo some more but kept getting attracted back to the signing booth…I dont know why .
After that I went and watched a few talks one by Quinton Flynn and Jeff Nimoy the other by Kandyse McClure. The guys were pretty funny doing their character voices and plugging their internet show The Adventures in Anime. While Kandyse seemed really sweet and spoke about her beginnings in acting back in Africa.

After the talks most of the guys finally arrived, so we did another walk around and Mike split off the go get Nichelle Nichols‘ autograph. Just after that (the time is now about 2.00pm) Mike goes off to listen to Nichelle’s talk, after a while we follow. To our surprise Tim and Jess are also there. Without saying a word I walked over, tapped Jess on the shoulder and pulled the signed photo out of from my bag. ‘Jewel’s here!’she exclaimed and they were off. If it had been a cartoon a smoke trail would have followed them. I’m glad someone else knows what I’m on about here.

Sitting there with my signed photo in my lap I couldnt help but get excited in anticipation for Jewel’s talk later in the day. My mind wondered…..to this day I have no idea what Nichelle was talking about.

After that we had Jewel’s talk (more on that later….perhaps )
Then we went to Jess and Tim’s house to watch Serenity…all in all a pretty freakin’ great day.

…can’t wait until next year’s

Here’s proof! A video that found on the internet that shows Jewel and I together!

AWW! Ain’t she so cute!
(note: I’m the guy with the screwed up hair when the camera turns…I got no idea what happened there!) For the following parts of this Q&A check out youtube.

In the Meantime…

I am currently in the process of writing a blog about the Supernova convention that rocked Perth at the end of last month. Unfortunately due to insinuating circumstances*, it’s taking me a little longer to write up. Hopefully I will get it up soon. In the meantime however please check out the link below. Dr Horrible’s Singalong blog is a new show developed by the famous Joss Whedon (Buffy, Firefly) staring Neil Patrick Harris (How i Met Your Mother) and Nathan Fillion (Firefly). Check out the trailer:

*I’m really forgetful, lazy, haven’t written in ages and just got myself a Nintendo DS.

Who Ya’ Gonna Call?

It was released a couple days ago that Sierra was working on a new Ghostbusters video game, to effectivly be Ghostbusters 3 and will finally have all 4 Ghostbusters back in the saddle. If this is gonna be on Wii im gonna strap my wii console to my back and use the control as a proton pack….its gonna be great. Check out the teaser….

John Rambo

John Rambo trailer number 2. I think it’s been been online for a while, but still…

WARNING: It’s pretty graphic…the way Rambo was meant to be.

Enjoy!

Serenity NOW!

Its 6.45 am and I’ve been up since 3.00am, I haven’t even gotten to work yet and I already can’t be bothered. Those that know me will know that I’m more of a…night person. but still, someone had to take my parents to the airport, and today that someone was me. I just finished watching the new episode of How I Met Your Mother, great episode, with even more helpful tips for everyday living.

Anyway I did have a point to this post and here it is. A while ago I came across this website, and after only recently having finished watching Firefly I was ready to explode with excitement upon hearing that a new movie might be in development. Cue the harsh downer, here’s a link to the blog of Jewel Staite, (NOTE: If you have not had a chance to see Serenity yet, DO NOT READ point 8. of her blog, my mind exploded!!!) who played the light-hearted Kaylee in Firefly and now plays the strong-willed Dr Jennifer Keller in the new season of Atlantis (that’s season 4 for all those who are reading this from the future, or happen to be Time Lords). Unfortunately, Jewel stats that the rumors about Serenity 2 came from an interview with Alan Tudyk who played the always joking pilot in the hit TV show. She says that “…it’s not happening at the moment… no matter what you read on the Internet.” So there goes that, at least for now.

Devil Went Down to Georgia

Have a look at this, someone made a stop-motion video to the song ‘The Devil Went Down to Georgia’. The song has changed a little as its the Primus version as compared to the Charlie Daniel’s Band version, and even though the quality isn’t to flash its still a pretty cool clip. I especially like the bobbing chickens and Johnny playing all around the devil.

Note: Stupid ifilm this took me ages to post!….I done told you once you son of a bitch ifiim, im the best there’s ever been!

Holidays with MacGvyer.

Sooo, John, Michael and I totally win at holidays! the chick at Flight Centre, as much help as she was with all her constant Brisbane knowledge totally overcharges as by like about $700 on accommodation. So here’s the story, previously I was researching where we were going to stay and cuz I’m so awesome, totally memorised the amounts we were supposed to be charged, so when the total for one place was like $500 more then what I saw on the Internet I was a little suspicious. we then all went back to HQ (ie Michael’s house) and looked up that shit. Of course, I was right! but I wasn’t to sure why it was so much more there were some theories flying around like, she maybe booking us the wrong apartment or some sort of uber commission. In the end we just waited to see her again. When we got there she was more puzzled then us as, apparently the prices were supposed to be the same as what you would find on the net for competitive reasons. Apparently commission is included in that amount or something, i dunno i wasn’t really paying attention at the time. So yeah, got all that money knocked off the initial bill. so I’m totally stoked!!!

So with the Jan LAN coming up, our holiday and the Maiden concert, January is going be one fucken awesome month, chockful of awes-tastic awesomeness….to the max!

On another note, we all bought seasons of MacGyver at like Kmart. if there was some sortof holiday in MacGyver’s honour I still don’t think there would be as much MacGyver-based action. i also got two more seasons of NCIS, so that rocks. Also John and Michael totally BOTH bought seasons 1,2 and 3 of MacGyver, as far as I remember happy days ensued!

 Peace!